Raging H

I am grumpy. Grumpy, Grumpy, GRUMPY.

And it feels good! Nobody likes being around me, but MAYBE I DON'T WANT TO BE AROUND THEM! (Pause for maniacal laughter followed by a leak of hysterical tears.)

Don't be concerned. It will not harm you.
It's only me pursuing something I'm not sure of...
I chase the bright, illusive butterfly of love.

(More disturbed laughter knowing that so few people will get that joke. It is private--for me.)

My bloodstream is an intricate roller coaster of hormones. I wouldn't be surprised if it was a girl. I remember feeling this out of control when I was pregnant with Claire. I wouldn't be surprised either if it was a boy because that is the only other choice. Isn't it?

I have a wonderful baby growing inside of me. It moves a lot and its movements are getting stronger, though no one wants to keep their hand on my belly long enough to feel it. I am so happy to be pregnant. It is such an amazing, wonderful thing. At 18 weeks people are starting to notice that I am pregnant, but not everyone. We had a ward pool party last night. One of our friends commented on how "perfect" my figure was and was surprised to find out I was pregnant. There was one or two others who had a similar reaction. Me, I feel huge. I think people don't notice my stomach because my bazonkas are getting proportionally huge to my belly growth, so the attention is still higher up. I must say, my new haircut does accentuate my magnificent, slender neck and shoulder line, further drawing attention away from my hips and belly. I look forward to being out of this in-between phase, though, and looking unmistakably pregnant.